This week delivered another blow to my gut. Quincy was my last part of my old life. My little buddy that has laid beside me during many tears, insisted on keeping me warm when I was cold and alone and demanded that I get up in the morning to face the day. Since Daegan has been gone, he even insisted on walks. He always listened and was the easiest relationship I had.
Tuesday evening, I returned home to see that he wasn’t well. He had been off his food the past couple of weeks and I assumed it was all the changes the two of us were coping with. By 9pm, I knew this was more than a “give it time” event and we were off to the animal emergency unit.
Within an hour of arriving, the seriousness of what turned out to be massive kidney/bladder stones had me alone making the decision to euthanize him. He was in a lot of pain and surgery wasn’t a guaranteed let alone financial option for me.
I held him and he trusted me to do what was right.
I miss him. I have been finding his treasures in the car, in the chair, under the couch. I think I have packed up the last of it this evening.
I know with my previous blogs I stated I am given what I need but I can’t imagine how I needed this. How he needed this.
Yesterday, I signed the lease for the home that I found for us. It is perfect in location so that I could have been home for lunch and within 10 minutes of the office even with traffic. It has a yard.
I thought all week whether the house was still right for me and then decided this is my time to be “reborn” start over and just be. The landlord has said if I want another dog that she will allow it. I am not ready.